Washington, D.C.--Saying the President finds gushing oil leaks and religiously-motivated terrorists "mind-numbingly dull," Obama's White House advisers are seeking out crises "with more intellectual depth" to capture the President's imagination.
"The President is so cerebral," said one official, "that what he really needs is, say, a super-villain like Brainiac to challenge him to a chess game for world peace. That would really get the President engaged. A guy trying to blow up a car stuffed with propane tanks in Times Square? Not so much."
Obama's advisers said that while the President did watch some footage of the largest oil spill disaster in U.S. history, he remarked "Wow, a bunch of crap coming out of the ground," with more than a little sarcasm. "Then he changed the channel to PBS and watched a show on the life cycle of cuttlefish."
Associated articles: National Review; McCaltchy
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