Washington, D.C.--According to the Gallup polling company, the 65 percentage-point gap between Democrats' and Republicans' average job approval rating for President Obama makes him by far the most polarizing President ever during his first year in office.
Now comes news that Obama plans to join forces with super-mutant Magneto to reverse the polarity of the Earth's magnetic field and the center-right alignment of the American electorate, throwing the country's economy into chaos.
Magneto told reporters, "My powerful magnetism, combined with the President's even more powerfully polarizing egotism, are unstoppable." Then he laughed maniacally.
At press time, MSNBC is reporting the X-Men may try to thwart Magneto's scheme by teaming up with another band of "super-mutants" called the Tea Party Patriots.
Associated articles: Gallup Poll; Gallup Poll 2; Gallup Poll 3; The Hill; Washington Post
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