"Living Constitution" Pronounced Dead

Washington, D.C.--After hearings were concluded on the President Obama's nomination of a new Supreme Court Justice, Juris Doctors pronounced the "Living Constitution" dead after the nation's supreme legal document failed to respond to pleas by Senators, left-wing judges, and academics for over 223 years.

"We held out hope that the parchment would give us a sign, any sign, that judges should impose their own personal views on what the Constitution should mean, based on their own contemporaneous policy preference," said one Harvard Law professor. "But the words in the Constitution just haven't budged."

Some Senators tried in vain during the hearings to articulate a plausible rationale regarding how anything resembling the "rule of law" could be upheld if the meaning of the Constitution turned on the shifting personal views of five out of nine Justices. But after hours of exhaustive blathering, they finally gave up.

Following the hearings, a candlelight vigil was held outside the National Archives, led by the Supreme Court's most prominent judicial activists.

"I feel empty inside," said one Justice, "not being able to look at that document and see myself reflected in it anymore."

"Living Constitution" Pronounced Dead

Washington, D.C.--After hearings were concluded on the President Obama's nomination of a new Supreme Court Justice, Juris Doctors pronounced the "Living Constitution" dead after the nation's supreme legal document failed to respond to pleas by Senators, left-wing judges, and academics for over 223 years.

"We held out hope that the parchment would give us a sign, any sign, that judges should impose their own personal views on what the Constitution should mean, based on their own contemporaneous policy preference," said one Harvard Law professor. "But the words in the Constitution just haven't budged."

Some Senators tried in vain during the hearings to articulate a plausible rationale regarding how anything resembling the "rule of law" could be upheld if the meaning of the Constitution turned on the shifting personal views of five out of nine Justices. But after hours of exhaustive blathering, they finally gave up.

Following the hearings, a candlelight vigil was held outside the National Archives, led by the Supreme Court's most prominent judicial activists.

"I feel empty inside," said one Justice, "not being able to look at that document and see myself reflected in it anymore."

A Message on the Second Amendment

A Message on the Second Amendment

Retirement Home Friends

We visited a nearby retirement home recently.

I love to see the cheerful looks on the residents' faces when they see young children walk through the door. (Joe and I are chopped liver at this point.)


Mikey perked up when this gentleman mentioned he used to fly B24 bombers in WWII. He told Mikey that they used to call the plane a "flying coffin" because the only exit was in the rear of the plane making it difficult to get out of in case of an emergency.


We're glad he can now laugh about it.


We're also glad to see that he and his wife still had a sense of humor after spending the evening at the E.R. after she fell out of bed and broke her arm in two places.

We've known this next gentleman for about four years now.

He's Yogi Berra's first cousin--really. At 95, Mr. Berra is as social as can be and invites our youngest to celebrate their November birthdays together. He loves to talk about the old farm back in St. Louis.

The kids always get a piece of fruit from his wheelchair stash.

It was one banana and three oranges this time! And I think his fruity gifts are very sweet.

Reminds me of when I worked as an elderly outreach volunteer in Appalachia. I rarely left a home without something--zucchini, green beans, even an owl statue once. Sweet.

We love to hear stories of the past from these residents.
We've met a widow whose husband was stranded on a South Pacific Island during the war.

We met a blind man who used to tune all of the concert pianos at the University of Texas.

We've met a former dancer, learned some Cajun traditions, heard the story of how a former nurse met her neurosurgeon husband on the job.

We've pet their cats and dogs, seen their frog figurine collections, looked through albums of their family photos, shared in their stories of celebration as well as tragedy...and have witnessed the end of some lives.

We have been enriched by it all, and the kids pray for these people and look forward to our visits.


One thing still has yet to be accomplished.


They haven't had the chance to drive one of these.

On the way out, Jimmer spotted one and said, "That electric chair over there looks too enticing. I wish I could hop on and go for a ride!"

I love his term, electric chair!

Luckily, we made it out before his willful resistance gave out! And maybe with luck, he'll eventually get the chance to pilot one.

He's already had a foot race against one older church friend who was driving full-tilt on his speedy electric wheelchair.

Democratic Senators Impressed with Kagan's Modesty at Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings

Washington, D.C.--Elena Kagan impressed Democratic Senators with her "extreme modesty" in both dress and speaking style as she appeared before the Senate Judiciary Committee for her Supreme Court confirmation hearing.

Wearing a straight jacket and mouth guard and strapped to an adjustable gurney, Kagan appeared to distance herself from a law review article she wrote previously in which she said Supreme Court Justice confirmation hearings had "taken on an air of vacuity and farce" because Senators refused to pin down nominees on their legal views and pursue a more "substantive inquiry" into the nominee's positions on particular legal issues.

Through muffled sounds, Kagan appeared to say her earlier article had been "skewed ... a little too much" in favor of candid answers, before she went silent and was wheeled away.

Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Patrick Leahy (D-VT) praised Kagan's "remarkable modesty" and said he looked forward to her release into a lifetime position at the Supreme Court.

Associated articles: Associated Press; George Will; Washington Post

Democratic Senators Impressed with Kagan's Modesty at Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings

Washington, D.C.--Elena Kagan impressed Democratic Senators with her "extreme modesty" in both dress and speaking style as she appeared before the Senate Judiciary Committee for her Supreme Court confirmation hearing.

Wearing a straight jacket and mouth guard and strapped to an adjustable gurney, Kagan appeared to distance herself from a law review article she wrote previously in which she said Supreme Court Justice confirmation hearings had "taken on an air of vacuity and farce" because Senators refused to pin down nominees on their legal views and pursue a more "substantive inquiry" into the nominee's positions on particular legal issues.

Through muffled sounds, Kagan appeared to say her earlier article had been "skewed ... a little too much" in favor of candid answers, before she went silent and was wheeled away.

Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Patrick Leahy (D-VT) praised Kagan's "remarkable modesty" and said he looked forward to her release into a lifetime position at the Supreme Court.

Associated articles: Associated Press; George Will; Washington Post

Self-Interested Power Hungry Schemers Testify in Favor of Supreme Court Nominee's Fitness for Lifetime Position Rewriting Constitution

Washington, D.C.--Several self-interested power-hungry schemers testified before the Senate Judiciary Committee in favor of the nomination of Elena Kagan to the Supreme Court after the New York Times reported that Kagan "never reveal[ed] too much of herself" and "never [went] too far out on a political limb" in order to follow a "calculated path" to the High Court, which was her "goal from the very beginning."

"I think Ms. Kagan is perfect for a lifetime position in which she could rewrite the Constitution for everyone," said Rachel Horntower, a noted suck-up and coldly calculating high school senior and law-student-to-be who never answers controversial questions in class to preserve her political viability. "I've already sacrificed my childhood and growing years engaged in relentlessly ambitious scheming, and some day I, too, hope to enjoy power in proportion to that sacrifice."

Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Patrick Leahy (D-VT) praised the testimony, saying he could not think of a better person to be in a position to "crush the Constitution like a fragile bird's nest" than someone like Ms. Kagan who had "plotted and strategized their entire life to achieve vast, unchecked power."

Associated articles: New York Times 1; New York Times 2

Self-Interested Power Hungry Schemers Testify in Favor of Supreme Court Nominee's Fitness for Lifetime Position Rewriting Constitution

Washington, D.C.--Several self-interested power-hungry schemers testified before the Senate Judiciary Committee in favor of the nomination of Elena Kagan to the Supreme Court after the New York Times reported that Kagan "never reveal[ed] too much of herself" and "never [went] too far out on a political limb" in order to follow a "calculated path" to the High Court, which was her "goal from the very beginning."

"I think Ms. Kagan is perfect for a lifetime position in which she could rewrite the Constitution for everyone," said Rachel Horntower, a noted suck-up and coldly calculating high school senior and law-student-to-be who never answers controversial questions in class to preserve her political viability. "I've already sacrificed my childhood and growing years engaged in relentlessly ambitious scheming, and some day I, too, hope to enjoy power in proportion to that sacrifice."

Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Patrick Leahy (D-VT) praised the testimony, saying he could not think of a better person to be in a position to "crush the Constitution like a fragile bird's nest" than someone like Ms. Kagan who had "plotted and strategized their entire life to achieve vast, unchecked power."

Associated articles: New York Times 1; New York Times 2

Random Happenings

There hasn't been a shortage of activity around here, but because it's been a while since I've posted, I've simply compiled some unrelated photos.

* * * * * * * * * *
The kids have been fiddlin' around quite a bit. They're learning a handful of new songs for their upcoming performances next month.

Their favorite new tunes are "The Devil Went Down to Georgia," "Orange Blossom Special," and "Cajun Fiddle."

We've started our new school year, and Mary Kate loves to read some of her new books to Jimmer.

Mary Kate's eyes water very easily.
They water when she watches me put in my contacts,
when she gets her teeth cleaned at the dentist,
when we simply TALK about her eyes watering.

In this case, she was reading to Jimmer about how sweat glands work!

Even though her eyes water easily, she is a little nurse in the making. She's always been the first one to offer help in an emergency.

A name poem I wrote last week for a friend's daughter who just lost her baby the week she was due. A very, very sad occasion.

My English/Spanish-teaching-sister-in-law is a fine editor.

This succulent plant makes me smile.


I love its cheerful flowery shapes.


This is what I found yesterday while doing laundry. It's from one son's pocket.

If I'm lucky, I find these things before they run through the washer and dryer.

It's all a boy needs: a stick, rubber band, knife, string, etc.

I think it's the precursor to his eventual "nerd pack." The best (and heaviest) nerd pack we know of is in the family. Put it this way, Grampy can build and figure out anything with the stash he keeps in his front-pocket pack! Along with a slide rule, calculator, daily meter-reading documentation, and handy engineering formulas; I believe he even keeps a little saw in there.

Lastly,

I just received the reel-to-reel tapes of my dad playing the King in "The King and I" his senior year of high school (1961) and had them transferred to CDs. So fun listening to them.


My aunt sent me these photos from her yearbook.

She also sent this one of my mom from the same year book.


Personally, I think it's refreshing to see that they're not all showing their belly buttons!

Okay, I believe this is about the most random post I've ever done. Then again, last week was busy and quite scattered, so it's somewhat fitting.

So goes life.

"Just Because I Serial Kill Republicans Doesn't Mean I Can't Report Objectively on Politics"

by Richard Pollender, Inmate No. 2071-12

Recently I was pressured to resign my reporter position at the Washington Post after police discovered the heads of several Republican and Tea Party members in a private oversized freezer in my own home. That outrageous assault on my professional integrity, as well as my lifetime imprisonment, is an outrageous assault on the freedom of the press, as my own personal hobbies and preferences don't have any impact on my ability to objectively report on politics.

What I do with the severed heads of my victims is my own business and has no effect whatsoever on the living Republican and Tea Party vermin who continue to roam freely throughout society. Indeed, as an avid collector of Republican and Tea Party appendages who has avoided arrest for almost a decade, I submit I bring a keener eye to the conservative movement.

My reporting stands for itself. My hand-sewn lampshades made of Republican flesh is an entirely separate body of work.

Associated article: Daily Caller

"Just Because I Serial Kill Republicans Doesn't Mean I Can't Report Objectively on Politics"

by Richard Pollender, Inmate No. 2071-12

Recently I was pressured to resign my reporter position at the Washington Post after police discovered the heads of several Republican and Tea Party members in a private oversized freezer in my own home. That outrageous assault on my professional integrity, as well as my lifetime imprisonment, is an outrageous assault on the freedom of the press, as my own personal hobbies and preferences don't have any impact on my ability to objectively report on politics.

What I do with the severed heads of my victims is my own business and has no effect whatsoever on the living Republican and Tea Party vermin who continue to roam freely throughout society. Indeed, as an avid collector of Republican and Tea Party appendages who has avoided arrest for almost a decade, I submit I bring a keener eye to the conservative movement.

My reporting stands for itself. My hand-sewn lampshades made of Republican flesh is an entirely separate body of work.

Associated article: Daily Caller

Talks Between Obama and French President's Hand Come to Standstill

Talks Between Obama and French President's Hand Come to Standstill

Instead of Passing Budget, Congress Passes Resolution Recognizing National Budget Week in Honor of Those Who Have Budgets

Associated articles: Politico; The Hill; Daily Caller; Associated Press

Instead of Passing Budget, Congress Passes Resolution Recognizing National Budget Week in Honor of Those Who Have Budgets

Associated articles: Politico; The Hill; Daily Caller; Associated Press

Latest Obama Rolling Stone Cover

Associated article: Rolling Stone

Latest Obama Rolling Stone Cover

Associated article: Rolling Stone

Obama to Focus on Gulf Spill After Oil Begins Washing Up on Sand Traps

Associated article: Daily Caller

Obama to Focus on Gulf Spill After Oil Begins Washing Up on Sand Traps

Associated article: Daily Caller

Labor Department Illegal Immigration PSA (Remix)

Related video: Daily Caller

Labor Department Illegal Immigration PSA (Remix)

Related video: Daily Caller

Father's Day

This father is:


really cute when he laughs at my jokes (I love to make him laugh!),
absolutely endearing when he laughs at the kids' jokes,
and adorable when he makes us all laugh;


a powerful superhero when he tosses our 75lb kids over his head into the pool,


playfully fun when he lets the kids tell him how to shave off his beard, step-by-step,


humble, yet inspiringly masterful when we drive over the first bridge he built (1993) next to Mansfield Dam on our way to the marina,



sweet and Godly when he tucks the kids in bed, leads nighttime prayers, and makes the sign of the cross on their foreheads,

adventurous and resourceful when he takes us on lots of fun trips,

patient and brilliant when he teaches the kids math and takes the time to answer all of their questions and explain how scientific things work,

adorably animated when he reads to the kids and makes different voices for all the characters,


He's just the best
Friend
Husband
and
Father.

Members of Congress Move to Reverse Their Listing as an Invasive Species

Washington, D.C.--The House and Senate moved quickly today to legislatively reverse the listing of Members of Congress on the "invasive species" list.

Invasive species are defined as foreign species that alter the environment in ways that support their own existence over native species. Members of Congress were designated as invasive after they passed the DISCLOSE Act, federal legislation that limits the ability of non-profit and for-profit corporations, but not unions, to criticize incumbents, and the Federal Trade Commission issued a draft proposal to have the federal government provide "direct and indirect" taxpayer-funded bailouts of journalists with the inevitable limits on free speech that would come with such federal funding.

"Once a species with an instinct for European socialist regulatory policies begins to restrict the ability of native American species to compete in a free market of ideas," said one political environmental expert, "it becomes invasive."

Members of Congress were placed on the list behind the brown tree snake and the Chinese mitten crab amidst concerns federal representatives "might soon even crowd out cockroaches."

Associated articles: Center for Competitive Politics; Reason; Daily Caller; associated report: Federal Trade Commission

Members of Congress Move to Reverse Their Listing as an Invasive Species

Washington, D.C.--The House and Senate moved quickly today to legislatively reverse the listing of Members of Congress on the "invasive species" list.

Invasive species are defined as foreign species that alter the environment in ways that support their own existence over native species. Members of Congress were designated as invasive after they passed the DISCLOSE Act, federal legislation that limits the ability of non-profit and for-profit corporations, but not unions, to criticize incumbents, and the Federal Trade Commission issued a draft proposal to have the federal government provide "direct and indirect" taxpayer-funded bailouts of journalists with the inevitable limits on free speech that would come with such federal funding.

"Once a species with an instinct for European socialist regulatory policies begins to restrict the ability of native American species to compete in a free market of ideas," said one political environmental expert, "it becomes invasive."

Members of Congress were placed on the list behind the brown tree snake and the Chinese mitten crab amidst concerns federal representatives "might soon even crowd out cockroaches."

Associated articles: Center for Competitive Politics; Reason; Daily Caller; associated report: Federal Trade Commission

Obama Interrupts Televised Lecture, Says He Won't Resume Until Everyone Puts Their Laptops Away

Associated article: CNN

Obama Interrupts Televised Lecture, Says He Won't Resume Until Everyone Puts Their Laptops Away

Associated article: CNN

Obama to Address Nation Tonight on His Speech Disaster of the Previous Evening

Associated article: National Review

Obama to Address Nation Tonight on His Speech Disaster of the Previous Evening

Associated article: National Review